5 Ways You Can Support Your Child After Your Divorce

by McConnell Family Law

Divorce often presents a difficult situation for the whole family, especially for children who might find it hard to understand and deal with the family changes. As a parent, supporting your child to navigate this transition is crucial for their emotional well-being and development. By exploring effective ways to support your child after a divorce, you can help mitigate the emotional impact and guide them through this challenging period. It is important that your child feels heard, secure, and loved despite the changes in the family structure, so they can adjust and maintain their well-being.

In this blog, we are highlighting our New Haven office, which is one of five convenient locations. Understanding how to best support your child after a divorce is essential. At McConnell Family Law Group, our experienced New Haven family law attorneys are here to provide guidance and assistance. We understand the challenges associated with such significant life changes and are committed to prioritizing your child’s well-being. For tailored advice and compassionate assistance, contact us today at (203) 344-7762.

Make Sure Your Child Knows They Are Loved

Sure, this piece of advice makes it at the top of every list and even seems extremely obvious to most parents. The fact is, however, that it bears repeating as often as possible. Now more than ever the kids need to know that they are loved by both parents. In addition to going out of your way to show them that they are loved, do what you can to ensure they know your ex-spouse loves them too. This may be difficult, but it will help them through this challenging time.

Help Your Child to Feel at Home with Both Parents

One of the most difficult things for children after a divorce is getting used to the fact that they will be living in two different homes. This is a huge adjustment with the constant moving back and forth between homes. To the extent possible, make sure your child feels at home in both places, with all the things that they need. They shouldn’t have to pack a suitcase or a bag to take back and forth because they don’t have everything they need at one residence.   

Express Interest When Your Child Returns From Your Ex

After your child has been with your ex-spouse, make sure you express interest and listen to your child. Many parents think that they should avoid asking questions because it may seem like they are prying into the life of the ex-spouse. The fact is, your child will likely want to share things and they shouldn’t feel like they need to keep the fun things they did with their other parent a secret. Encouraging your child to share everything with you (and your ex) is an important step in helping them to adjust to this new “two-home” way of life.

Embrace the Awkward

For many years to come, you and your ex-spouse will have to attend school events, sports, parties, and many other things together for the sake of your child. It will often be awkward and uncomfortable. As parents, it is your job to just deal with it and move on. Just because something is hard doesn’t mean your child doesn’t want both parents to be there for them.

Keep Routines Intact

Maintaining a consistent and organized daily routine is crucial for your children, especially in times of change. It provides them peace and stability, serving as a reliable element in their lives. It’s important for parents and guardians to maintain this sense of normalcy by keeping routines intact.

In situations where everything else may be changing, a well-established routine can provide your children with a comforting sense of order and expectation. Keeping regular schedules for meals, homework, playtime, and bedtime helps them organize their day and gives them a structure within which they can confidently and securely navigate their surroundings.

However, it’s important to ensure that routines do not become an excuse for leniency regarding rules or responsibilities. Your children should recognize that daily tasks such as chores, homework, and other duties are non-negotiable aspects of their lives, emphasizing the importance of responsibility and their contributions to family life and personal growth.

By keeping the routines intact, your children will learn to trust the provided structure, fostering the development of self-discipline and time management abilities. These skills are invaluable assets that will serve them well throughout their lives, as they grow and continue to face new and diverse challenges.

The first weeks and months after a divorce can significantly impact a child’s emotional well-being. Providing continuous emotional support to children during this time is crucial to help them mitigate the distress associated with the divorce. It is essential to persist in supporting your children, regardless of the duration, to minimize the negative effects of the divorce. The McConnell Family Law Group understands the nuances of Connecticut divorces. If you have any family law matters that need to be settled or handled, please contact us at (203) 344-7762 to schedule a consultation.

5 Ways You Can Support Your Child After Your DivorceDescription
Make Sure Your Child Knows They are LovedReiterate love from both parents to the child; reassure them during challenging times.
Help Your Child to Feel at Home with Both ParentsEnsure both homes are comfortable and equipped with essentials to minimize stress during transitions.
Express Interest When Your Child Returns From Your ExEncourage open communication and sharing between the child and both parents, fostering trust and adjustment.
Embrace the AwkwardAccept and manage the inevitable discomfort of co-parenting interactions, prioritizing the child’s well-being and support over personal discomfort.
Acknowledge and accept uncomfortable situations when co-parentingPrioritize the child’s well-being over personal discomfort, demonstrating maturity and cooperation in challenging situations.
Allow Children to be Upset or DisappointedValidate and acknowledge the child’s emotions, providing support and understanding during moments of sadness or disappointment throughout the divorce process.

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